There was a time when everything I ever wanted was to be in Beirut, the beloved home, the enchantress of the Mediterranean, the city that – as the Lebanese Ministry of Tourism would once have it – “will never surrender.” But that changed, and well before the socioeconomic crisis turned our lives upside down, and the blast ensured that our lives would never and could never be the same again. The moment had come for a serious recalibration of my relationship with the city. The invitation to be a contributor to German literary magazine Die Horen’s special issue on Beirut gave me the first chance to do so, at least on paper.
Continue reading ““Hope is a Dangerous Thing””The Good Old Days – أيام الزمن الجميل
“This living room used to be wider; this balcony used to be more spacious. Of course your love, ya habibi, was as big as the whole wide world.” – Fairuz, “It Wasn’t Like This.”
In one of many songs written and composed by her son Ziad, Fairuz laments how different things around her once were. The living room, the lemons, the olives…even the soap was different! ‘Different’ undoubtedly implying ‘better’, and applying to everything from inanimate objects to the love of a dear one. Apparently, that someone’s love ended up as sour as the lemons…
Continue reading “The Good Old Days – أيام الزمن الجميل”Selective Writer’s Block: When Some Things Are Better Left Unwritten
“Darkness is oppressive. Silence echoes what I do not want to hear. Night is a curse that keeps on coming back. Night is the green screen onto which everything is projected, what I do not want to see nor feel, my anxieties, my fears and pains. The sunrise ushers the relief of light, the glow of which makes the burden of things feel slightly lighter.
The hustle and bustle of survival gets in the way of despondence, yet the feeling lurks around almost every corner. The day feels endless because the struggle for survival offers no respite. And before you know it, darkness comes and it starts all over again. More often than not, this is how it feels these days.”
Continue reading “Selective Writer’s Block: When Some Things Are Better Left Unwritten”One Month Since the Beirut Blast: “The Wound Will Always Stay Open”
It’s been one endless, torturous month already. One month since what were childhood nightmares of war exploded when we thought we were living in peace. One month since our lives came shattering down into unrecoverable pieces in front of our eyes, just like the glass that remains in every street and corner of this broken city. One month since we thought that life could not get any more despondent, but to our own despair, it did. One month since the Beirut Port blast, since all the paths we ever walked in the city were drawn in blood, since its sound continues to reverberate, viciously intertwined with ambulance sirens, cries of fear and pain, since the night’s mortal silence became a sound only few were brave enough to listen to. One long month and it feels like the wound will always stay open.
Continue reading “One Month Since the Beirut Blast: “The Wound Will Always Stay Open””“And So We Drive On: Short Stories” Out Now
It’s here, finally. Continue reading ““And So We Drive On: Short Stories” Out Now”
Stories in the Times of Corona
These are no ordinary times. I doubt anybody in their wildest dreams (even those behind movies that told a similar story to what is happening today) imagined that, a day would come when the world, would suddenly, stop. That our lives would be turned completely upside down; that nothing could remain like it used to be beyond the confines of our homes; and that very little would stay the same when life slowly comes back to how we used to know it. Continue reading “Stories in the Times of Corona”
“Liban : Messages Pour Un Pays”
Since all of us here in Lebanon are in revolutionary mode these days (67 days no less & counting), I’d like to tell you a small story:
In 2014, and in the run up to the 40th anniversary of the start of Lebanon’s civil war, local and independent publishing house NoirBlancEtCaetera thought of commemorating this painful chapter in our history with a book. The premise was all about hope and not giving up on Lebanon, to be individually expressed by a varied group of Lebanese authors, writing a message to Lebanon and a declaration that despite all the ups and downs, all the challenges and lost opportunities, there was still hope for Lebanon. The project was delayed but revived earlier this year, and writers were informed during the summer that the book was set to be officially launched in mid-October. Our beautiful October 17 Lebanese Revolution delayed the official launching, but it still happened in the midst of our revolution, despite the odds. And in all honesty, I do not think there could have been any better time to publish and launch it anyway. Continue reading ““Liban : Messages Pour Un Pays””
“From What Used to be My Window”
For as long as I have written about Lebanon, I have realized that the road toward change would need time and patience. I knew it would take a lot of time, but the more time passed, the more I ran out of patience and deeper into hopelessness that I would see any change at all. Continue reading ““From What Used to be My Window””
Ungrateful, Beirut
Beirut never asks you to come back to it. It entices you to and makes you come back out of your own volition. If Beirut were a person, it would be irresistibly charming, more than anybody you would ever meet. Someone you would keep falling hopelessly in love with, even though you’d always know it would be a tumultuous, love and hate relationship with no future whatsoever. If Beirut were a force of nature, it would be a glorious sunset after a furious storm, though you’d always be left guessing when the next storm will hit, because it always does and stronger than the one before. Continue reading “Ungrateful, Beirut”
“Godless in the Land of Gods”
Note: This is the last in a series of four thematic Lebanon-related posts, based on a conversation between the author and a Lebanese citizen who preferred to remain anonymous. The first three posts (on politics and the parliamentary elections, the economy and the environment) were published last year.
Eye on the East (EOTE): Happy Easter.
Lebanese Citizen (LC): Thanks, I guess.
EOTE: Not much of an Easter person yourself? Continue reading ““Godless in the Land of Gods””
Eye on the East 